A year and a half ago, in the emergency room, a nurse handed me two pieces of paper. It was around 1:00 am in the middle of the week. One page had a list of local counselors, the other of local A.A. meetings.
It all felt like a vivid nightmare.
I'm 21, I thought, I'm not an alcoholic. I'm a "good kid". I didn't even drink until I turned 21. (Seriously.) That was what, 9-10 months ago?
Wow, things really had escalated.
I went home from college that weekend to tell my parents, whose insurance was about to take on this medical bill. My parents don't drink, and didn't know I did either.
That wasn't a good conversation.
I cried, a rarity for me, 3 of the 4 hours back to school.
I really wish I could say that was the end.
A little over a week ago I celebrated being four months sober. Not a huge milestone, but for me, very possibly the difference between life and death.
I still don't know how to talk directly about that part of my life. I've lost good friends who felt like I kept too much from them, and others who I dumped every burden on. There's close friends I haven't spoken to about it at all, because it's so much. How do you casually bring that up? How much information is enough? Too much?
Because of this experience, I am so excited about @beautifulboymovie.
From just the previews, so much of the dialogue rings familiar.
portrays the real story of @nic_sheff
and his struggle with addiction. I could go line-by-line through the trailer with how relevant this movie is to me and to countless, faceless others, but I'm just going to leave it by saying I won't be wearing eye makeup to this movie. I am planning a good, cathartic cry when I see this film. Like ugly bawling. Something purging and cleansing. It's been a while coming.
This trailer will be linked in my bio for a bit, so you can watch it there, or by searching for it on YouTube.