I don’t know about you, but I made it my personal goal to always be better than I was the last time. If I was emotional, this time I will not be. If I was visibly angry, this time I will keep it together. I used to get mad at the people who wanted to see me fall apart. Now I know that I’m doing it right because I don’t care what they think. People will try everything to keep you in their comfort zone. Don’t fall for it.
I had to come to terms that I put myself here so now I had to dig myself out. Was I going to let this experience ruin me for life? Absolutely not. Did I feel like curling up and dying? Yup, I did. So many other things that left me traumatized came right back up to the surface. I had to ask myself what I was really made of and if I could truly change my life. No guts no glory. This sentence came up again and again. Why not you? Why can’t you have the life you truly want?
Anxiety is often about control. You’ve likely experienced something not going the way you’d like and getting hurt or embarrassed.
But trying to control outside factors is impossible and will only exacerbate the anxiety.
Trust in yourself, and FLY
One of the best things I ever did for me was to forgive myself and allow the space for a really deep self love to evolve. “I will never put myself in this negative space of putting up with what I didn’t deserve ever again.”
Were you basically thrown in the trash without a second thought? That’s because you started to see through the bullshit and once that happens, you no longer serve a purpose to the narcissist. Please know you are strong, and your strength intimidates them, it scares them. You were discarded because of this strength, because ultimately you are better than them, and they must move on to someone who doesn’t speak up, who doesn’t see through their lies yet.
I take photos of myself on my phone when I feel like I might be detaching/dissociating so if I end up losing a few days I have a timeline as to when I started to slip. I took this one last night. I feel like it’s from a horror movie...and well...it kinda is. This has hands down been the hardest month (Jan/Feb) of my life and it has made me use every tool I have taught myself in regards to trying to stay present during trauma flashbacks/episodes. I’m not afraid to talk about my Cptsd. I’m pretty sure most people have it in some way, shape or form because god damn, there are some fucked up people in this world and if you are one of the goods ones, they find you and they suck out your soul. Still here. Still trying. Could use some love and support vibes. It’s not over yet, but soon. Xo
Narcissists will make you feel like you’re the problem because you have an issue with the abuse... they make you think that you’re crazy for reacting in such a way to turn the focus off of them and on to you.
I recently heard these two phrases while walking past a cafe. The person speaking, a male, said “digo yo” with such self-confidence verbally and with his hands; then he paused. His next statement - so elegantly said with heartfelt gestures- was “mi verdad”. It just hit me deep to the core! I think this is my 2019 lesson and practice to put into place. 💛
There are some of my girls who are in relationships with narcissists and have no idea how to get out. There are also some that may end UP in such relationships if they’re not careful! I won’t delve into it too much right now, but the first Monday in MARCH, I will be doing FB lives to bring AWARENESS and PREVENTION!!! So, stay tuned! And in the meantime stay WOKE.... They (narcissists) are running rampant in the land and they will suck the life out of you and diminish your sense of self if you’re not careful!💛
Woman’s Worth and Healing Coach💛
#narcissist #narcissisticabuse #narcissistsawareness #narcissistsurvivor #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissism #malignantnarcissist
You can read all the books, see all the therapists, post all the memes, but if you’re not putting what you learn into practice, you’re spinning your wheels.
This is a RECOVERY page and the intention behind my posts is simple.
1. To provide information which identifies the narcopath characteristics, so you understand that this is abuse and not love.
2. To provide tools and info for healing. Healing from narcissistic abuse isn’t like anything else and requires an understanding that only a survivor can relate to. These tools seem simple, but it takes repetition and commitment. This recovery isn’t easy but it can be simplified.
3. To empower you. Only you can heal yourself. None of us here can get you there or give you all the answers, only support, hope and direction. The rest is up to you. Once you realize this, you have the power to heal. 💯
You have to want this recovery and be WILLING to implement change. Yes, of course no one wants to stay in the pain of this, so dig deep. You’re strong enough even at your weakest point to find the will to REALLY live. 🖤
#narcissist #narcissisticabuse #narcissism #triangulation #hoovering #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #narcissistrecovery #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissistsurvivor #domesticabuse #domesticabusesurvivor #domesticabuseawareness #toxicpeople #toxicrelationships #gaslighting #gaslightingawareness #crazymaking #lovebombing #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth #selfcare #trauma #healing #psychopath #psychopathfree
In my opinion...Sunday’s should be considered a day of self care! Whether that is church for you, time just being with your family, laying in bed ALL day, going to the spa, whatever self love looks like to you, make sure you allow yourself some on Sunday. The day before the busy week ahead is a day to also make sure you are prepped for the week. 💕
What are some of your favorite ways to show yourself love?
Last night I slept with this delightful mask on, so today I could wake up feeling fresh faced and moisturized. I will snuggle the pup for a while, get my “balanced” workout in, then get up and prep some grab and go food for the week. Although food prep used to be a chore for me I now look at is as time to just be or I will listen to a pod cast or music. It’s easier now knowing how much time it frees up during the week. 💕
Today...take some time for you!
Trauma creates a sensory overload that encodes into your brain and can trigger flashbacks and nightmares. These can be visual, emotional, somatic or a collection of many sensory experiences.
Which is why the psychosensory therapies are the key to recovery.
If you’d like to find out more info message me.
one of the most powerful things a mental abuse victim can overcome is the feeling that the things that they suffered were their fault. i have been feeling an overwhelming sense of achievement lately in starting to feel exactly that. rediscovering my mental and physical strengths has helped me to build myself up. i have worked my ass off to be the parent my daughter needs me to be and will continue to be strong and close to her in her journey through life. i honestly believe my life was made complete when i gave birth to my sweet sweet love, and i will continue to attempt to heal and try to forgive myself for the pain and suffering i caused us both . my trauma is not my fault, but my healing is my responsibility 🤙🏻 #trauma #abusevictim #loveyourself #healing #parenting #growthroughwhatyougothrough #narcissistsurvivor
make you feel crazy - that is a fact! It happens so slowly, yet we all arrive at the same point - questioning our sanity! They are experts in conditioning our minds from their constant, yet cunning critiquing of every part of our lives. This can, and will affect your future if you don’t change your thought patterns, and eradicate them from your mind. This is WHY - once I understood this, I created my course - FREE yourself from the narcissist - as I knew I had to help others - to transform your life - exactly as I had! My LIVE course starts tomorrow - details in my BIO @megan.holgate
- hope you join me and other brave women to make 2019 the year to step into who you are meant to be! Happy Sunday ⭐️✨⭐️
True transformation takes time, patience and grace. It takes being ok with your imperfections and celebrating your wins. I’ve been on this journey for almost 2 years now and have never looked back. It hasn’t always been easy but it has been so worth it! 💓
Come along side me, sister friend and let me show you what you’re made of! 🙌🏼
People who are self-absorbed won’t get this. As you know- I am a big advocate of self care and putting yourself first. But that is in no way being self absorbed. Having a “me-first, me-only” attitude stems from being solely focused on your wants and needs with absolutely no consideration for others. Whereas- self-care involves making sure you get your needs met and setting boundaries so you don’t wear yourself out by helping and rescuing others.
#wellnesscoach #selfcareisnotselfish #healthyboundaries #bewhoyousayyouare #narcissistsurvivor