Today, Monte will drink his last bottle of breast milk. As I stare at this little plastic bag of frozen gold, I have a whole mix of emotions. Sadness-at the fact that Monte’s little body will never again be dependent on mine. Paranoia-that he won’t be as “healthy” as he could be. Defeat-because of the sick comparison in my own mind that tells me that other moms ‘lasted longer.’ The list goes on.
But you know what? God checked me in the middle of my pity party and self-judgement to remind me that this body did exactly what He created it to. It held and grew this little man, it nurtured him, fed him and now, it will teach him.
I must tell you, breastfeeding was NOT what I expected it to be. I hated it for the first... well, really, the whole time 🤣 I got used to it, but it wasn’t “enjoyable” for me. Some moms will judge me for saying that, but some will relate completely. I am actually surprised to be mourning the end, I quietly looked forward to this day-since I started. And now I’m sad. But it’s what makes sense for both Monte and I with my work travel and his five piranha teeth. 🤪 We made it eight solid months and he is so very healthy and happy! PRAISE GOD!
I am a HUGE advocate for #fedisbest
and offer absolutely no judgement to moms who formula feed out of the gate or breastfeed forever but for some reason, I am so hard on myself. I am SO thankful for the community of mommas that I have to encourage, counsel and love me through all of my stupid mom guilt. Fellowship is honestly the best gift that a mom can have. Postpartum is TOUGH and like every other journey we navigate through, God has intended us to walk through it with people. .
If you are in the area and don’t have a solid group of moms to connect with, cry with, laugh with and wipe butts with, PLEASE dm me. Isolation is from the enemy. 💯
So, Monte. Cheers to your last 6 ounces of tit milk 🍻🍼 This dairy farm is closed..