New post! “I’ll Only Know In the Moment” part 1- (link in bio) 13th day in CDMX. I did not feel so brave today, but I can pinpoint its origins. It feels like lifetimes have passed since I left TX, in August. The countless lives, identities we have lived before today, yet this moment is all we have. We can't ever be sure what the next one will or will not bring us.
I went to reheat leftovers & found my food was stolen from the hostel/hotel kitchen. I've never stayed in a place that functions quite like this one. But there is an unwritten code amongst travelers and it was broken.
I scrawled a letter to the thief, telling them that if they were poor & hungry- it was wrong & hoped that they were nourished and enjoyed it. But if the person who nicked my food was just lazy or uncaring- I told them to “go fuck themselves.” I later left a postcard- apologizing for that tone along w/ a smattering of pesos if someone needed them.
I returned & two notes in Spanish had been written next to mine- rebuking the robber. The postcard & pesos still left on the counter. A shred of hope in humanity restored.
I wasn’t as upset about stolen food, it felt like a betrayal to my quest or whatever this half-planned and half-flying by the seat of my pants thing I’m doing. Perhaps that's how life is supposed to be. We live on precarious edges each moment. We take waking up, sex, FOOD, & limbs for granted. We withhold love from those we love or are "supposed" to love the most. We cannot give what we don’t have. And “I do not want what I haven’t got.” That's a lie, & the name of Sinead O'Connor's debut album. 😆 Still, there is some truth in that sentiment.
Stranger in a strange land. The Man Who Fell to Earth. Will I ever find a place that is home- which can contain these multitudes? “Have you forgotten? You are multitudes. You can never be contained in words or bodies, alone.”
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