🙃 Confession time 🙃
I started this account at around 2am (and it's nearly 4am today as I'm writing this) with a very strong desire to lose weight, but on the 31st I went over and sorta gave up. The classic "oh I've gone over my calorie budget so I'm just gonna binge now", but I didn't just binge that day. I've been binging since. Literally for 2 freaking weeks!! What the actual f is wrong with me?! Sliding back into #badhabits
The measley pound I did lose I put STRAIGHT back on... ffs
Tbh, it was a combination of things. Lack of motivation, partner being an enabler, lack of control over what food I could eat (I'm a poor ass MA student that lives at home and my parents aren't exactly role models with food, so fuck all veg in most days. I kid you not, fish fucking fingers and bastard chips with mother fucking peas is considered a "good meal" for them! And I, without a damned penny atm only have the option to eat what's cooked). And in all honesty, with shit that's kicked off eating healthy is at the bottom
I guess you could call them all excuses? But fuck that, take away my only source of comfort and imma be angry 😂
I need a total mindset recall/rewiring. Whatever. I already openly call myself "the fb" in the group (fb = fat bastard). I think I do it to shock people, for a joke? A way to cover up the hurt? Or to express my anger?
Before I can start this journey properly I'm gonna to have to start loving myself
As RuPaul says, if you can't love yourself how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?
#weightloss #relapse #journey #hatemyself #selflove #learnfrommistakes #reflect #snapchat #student #beatingmyfoodaddiction #likeforlike #followforfollow