Just a reminder to all of you beautiful beings out there to keep going and know that today is a new day. Forget the troubles of yesterday and keep moving forward. One step at a time, keep that #recoveryninja
attitude going 👊🏼 YOU are WORTHY of a life full of happiness, health and joy. Remember this as you carry on with your day ✌🏼
Last night I stood in front of a room full of people and shared how my battle with anorexia nearly killed me some 10 years ago. Yoga was (and still is) one of my lifelines. Telling my story in such a vulnerable way was a big step outside my comfort zone, but the messages from those who are battling or have battled something similar make every belly butterfly worth it.
Eating disorders are silent, but fatal diseases. When we avoid talking about them, they remain hidden, and that’s when things get really scary. The more we can share with each other, the less we will suffer alone.
The support of loved ones is the foundation of it all.
Reach out if you need help. We are here for each other. I love you.
I completed my first full day of eating without the MFP app. It was most deffo challenging! I still estimated the calories of everything I ate. Thanks to MFP, I am a calorie content expert 🙄
During my walk, I listened to a podcast about an eating disorder recoverer. Her story was very touching & she spoke with such wise words. One thing she expressed that has really stuck to me is that during her recovery, she realised that her trying to change her body size is the same as her trying to change her shoe size. She explained that our bodies have an ideal size that it’s comfortable being at & trying to change it will remove this comfort. If you have size 6 feet & your trying to squeeze them into size 5 shoes, it just wouldn’t work right?
This makes so much sense. Unfortunately, the volume of my logical thoughts is much lower than the volume of the thoughts coming from my eating disorder at the moment. 😪
I am visiting my GP again tomorrow & I’m hoping she has sorted out therapy for me so I can make a quick start. I’m desperate for this therapy! I need this all to stop so bad. I also have my interview for another job I applied for & I’m super nervous 😬
This lifestyle isn’t for me. It just doesn’t fit. I need to keep going & I need to keep fighting for peace with myself, my mind & my body. 🌈🌸
#edrecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorderawareness #edawareness #bulimic #bulimiarecovery #bulimia #bingeing #bingeating #bingeandpurge #anxiety #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #selfhealing #therapy #foodanxiety #blog #myblog #mentalhealthblogger
What a beautiful day to be alive.
Simply being in the moment and enjoying what you are doing, no matter how small or miniscule a task can feel so freeing. When I was 17 and spending endless hours in DBT and CBT, I thought mindfulness was inherently useless. I thought the only way to achieve happiness was the large picture being filled with joy. Now, in a healthier state of mind, and physically healthier, I can see that it is the opposite. Being an adult is stressful. Having a job is stressful. Money is stressful. Life continues, and you have the choice to slow down and stay in the moment, or watch it go by. The older I get, the faster time seems to go. It's hard to just stop and see what's happening right in front of you. You live day to day, waiting for the weekends, that only go too quickly. Waiting, hesitating, stalling, whatever word you chose, is no way to go through life. Happiness is being content, even when there is stress. I have days that are hard. Days I don't want to get out of bed. Days I am sick of being in the system set up to work, and then die. It doesn't have to be like that. I wake up with the intent of everyday being a good day, even if it doesn't end up being so. I know deep down that if I awoke everyday expecting it to be bad, it WILL be bad. Optimism has become so important to me, even while I understand it isn't a fix all solution. I of course have times where I see the world and feel hopeless, everyone does. So what do you do? You wake up the next day and continue forward.
I believe in all of you. I believe in your capabilities. I believe tomorrow will come, and you will find your will to continue onward and prosper. Fight, my friends. You are worth the fight. You are worthy of life and everything beautiful it can hold.
Long rant ahead.
WHY would you, as an ed patient, post so many photos of you with a feeding tube, protruding bones, and "after" photos where you're still very skinny, all tagged as #edrecovery
, and #healthyisthenewskinny
?! I know some people are aware of how triggering this is, so don't give me the "I just want to share my progress" bs. Making a trigger warning doesn't help; that just makes someone vulnerable feel more attracted to the post. If you're not truly engaged in recovery, then okay, that's your ow process, but don't act as if you are because it gives a false impression of what recovery is.
Now, addressing everyone with or without an ED. Most of us (patients) have/had such a poor image that we never look/looked as some Instagram recovery "idols" make you believe, all badass and with a fascinating fashion style. At 17, I used to wear the same loose, gray sweater everywhere because it let me feel hidden. At 20, my dysmorphia was so extreme I stopped going to uni because I was scared of being seen. That's why dramatic photos, numbers, or similar information isn't valuable, since it's all focused on the physique.
So please, STOP giving more importance to our weight than to our minds, ESPECIALLY if you have an ED. 🚫🏥 We say doctors shouldn't focus on someone's body mass index to diagnose them with a MENTAL illness, but then we go and act as if someone only deserves help if they're in a wheelchair. There's nothing "cool" about that, and it doesn't help anyone if we compete with each other to see who's the "sickest".
Long story short, DON'T GLAMORIZE MENTAL ILLNESSES. 🙏🏼 And know that you deserve help even if you don't look "#anarecovery
enough", because that doesn't really exist (and anorexia is definitely not the only disorder out there).
Could someone please help me or offer some advice I don’t know what to do?
Sunday, a day of rest which I most definitely have fulfilled back in the comfort of my own home ☕️
today I woke up later than I have been, forgot to get dressed until lunch and still slept after; I love doing nothing though I hate it. I beat myself up for it. I know that each person should listen to what their body needs and today I needed rest. I hope you’ve all enjoyed your Sunday and have listened to your bodies too!⭐️
Recently (13 days ago recently) I’ve been reintroduced to exercise and my body feels so much stronger for it; it feels achy, my muscles are waking and stamina quickening. My body is healthy, fuelled and able. I’m not going to punish it anymore only give it strength, love and eventually acceptance. Exercise has always made me(the healthy me)and the unhealthy streak of that can f’ off! If it means I have to include rest days and perhaps even eat more (!!!) then so be it, because getting physically stronger is helping my mental strength (I think) and to get Heather back is beyond important.🏆
This is a battle and negative thoughts are constantly crawling around, but at least they aren’t sprinting! Notice how far you’ve come and not how far there is left to go, all the love, H💗xxx
LOVED this pitaya smoothie at the vegan festival yesterday! Thank you @absofruitlyus
1st picture was my breakfast which was 30g Cheerios with 200mls semi skimmed milk and a crumpet. 2nd picture was 2 cupcakes I challenged myself to this afternoon because I did baking with my little brother and then tea was a jacket potato with baked beans and 25g cheese and salad. Feeling guilty!
Lovely to receive this booklet from BEAT showing all the wonderful work they have done over the past year
To everyone who sponsored our walk in March - thank you! This is what you were helping support ❤️❤️❤️
Tomorrow will be better 💖💖💖
Things no one tell you about Eating Disorder recovery... tonight’s blog post is digging deep into the bits about recovery no one knows. I hope this helps some of you 💖 Links in the bio 💖
It’s weird. 🤔 💭 Do you ever look in the mirror after a workout and think “dang I look good!” And later that day after a piece of chocolate cake look back in the same mirror and think “gosh, I’ve really let myself go. I’ve gained so much weight.” THIS CAN LITERALLY HAPPEN IN THE SAME DAY. 😳🤦🏻♀️ We really need to break the cycle in our mind that a piece of cake = weight gain and that a workout = immediate results. We need to build a healthy pattern of being food inclusive and not excluding food groups. And lastly, everytime you look at yourself in the mirror, I hope you can say something nice to yourself. 💕 Our mind can really play tricks on us. Don’t let it win! 🤗
Yesterday night I deleted MFP. I’ve had enough of the influence this app has over my eating! During my bingeing, I kept thinking ‘shit I’ve eaten almost 2000 calories already now I’m about to eat another 1000 more!!’ My anxiety was on another level.
If I didn’t track my food & if I didn’t know exactly how many calories I had already, I firstly wouldn’t have binged & secondly, I wouldn’t have experienced so much anxiety.
The main worry for me now is purposely under-eating because I don’t seem to trust myself without the app. I know the exact calories for my breakfast from having the same everyday & I’m currently at Starbucks having a coffee to suppress my appetite. I will deffo have lunch though... probably a healthy grain salad thing or some sushi. 🍣
I’m really going to try & listen to my body. I need to ignore this anxiety & just eat what I want. Hopefully I can keep this up but I know healing is not linear. I’m just happy & proud of myself for trying 🌸
#bulimic #bulimia #bulimiarecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorderawareness #edawareness #edrecovery #recovery #anxiety #foodanxiety #bingeing #bingeeating #bingeeatingrecovery #bingeandpurge #mentalhealth #selfhealing
Repost from @haley.blackman
- NO ONE chooses to have an eating disorder. They are shame inducing, guilt ridden, anxiety forming and depressing, disordered ways of thinking that once have taken root are extremely difficult to heal. An alcoholic doesn't need to drink, a drug addict doesn't need to use, a shopaholic doesn't need to shop: but we all need to eat. However, with sheer strength and determination alongside a good support network, recovery is totally possible. Whether or not ED survivors always have an issue with food is purely down to the individual and their story, but finding security in no longer needing the disorder is a huge accomplishment and one that we are ALL capable of achieving if we choose it 💗✨ #edawarenessweek #edawareness #edrecovery
There I said it. 🤷🏼♀️
You didn’t get to where you are overnight… so why do you think you can reach your goals over night? Why do you think you can create a better life overnight? 🤷🏼♀️ You can’t. Plain and simple. But find joy in the PROCESS.❤️
When someone decides to finally level up and change their life—whether that be working on themselves and a mindset shift, health and fitness goals, or deciding to start a whole new venture such as coaching my world lights up by their excitement.🙌🏻
I remember where I was 2.5 yrs ago. I decided it was time for a change and took massive action. I have never looked back. My life now versus 2 years ago is massively different. I have an entirely new circle of friends. I have my health and wellness back. I have a positive mindset. (And those extra funds in the bank for working on me is just an added bonus😉).
But it took me to just DECIDE that I no longer wanted to stay where I was. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, changes when you stay in your comfort zone. When I look back, I realize how fun it ended up being in order to get to where I am. Sure, there were plenty of unknowns. But it was a simple process. Day in and day out I just got better. •
I can’t imagine my life any other way right now. If you are sad, anxious, frustrated, depressed, overweight and feel like there is something out there that can help you turn it all around then you are reading this for a reason. God has a way of throwing life rafts at you whether you see them or not. Get in the freaking boat!!!
Even if no one understands the struggles you are going through, even if no one acknowledges the efforts you put into recovery everyday, even if you slip up a million times... You are no less worthy of recovery! Your pain is real. Your efforts are valid. Every little step you take in your recovery is meaningful. 💜
It’s a not so bright day today so I’m hoping my smoothie bowl can brighten your day! This was pre-workout brekkie! I didn’t do heavy weights today, just a body weight circuit & 7k run to break a sweat!🏃🏼♀️💦
UPDATE: I’m heading to Preston today for 6 days, to work at a Summer Youth Camp! I’m a youth leader & it’s an exciting & rewarding role! I get to spend my week with incredible young people who inspire me!! This week I can’t promise i’ll post everyday! I’ve batched content in advance so I’ve a few scheduled & I do plan to show you guys the food I eat whilst away! (None of which I’ll have cooked. We’re completely catered for!) Typical Jen style, I’ve packed some healthy snacks, my @yourzooki
omegas & my vitamin supplements!🧡
I hope you all have an excellent week!☺️
haven’t been posting much the past few days because i’m trying to deal effectively with my mood. some days are good and some days are really bad. it’s exhausting but i am getting better at dealing with it. i’m really nervous for my appointments next week too & i just feel in a really vulnerable state of mind at the moment. i’m so scared about getting triggered and taking everything so personally is hard enough without it making you want to basically starve yourself / isolate yourself. mental health is challenging and a rollercoaster of so many emotions and experiences, but i do strongly believe that bad times come and go but hope and strength are ALWAYS there. i am a strong person and i will get through this, things are already a lot better than they were a month ago & i continue to fight every single day even when my mind is screaming at me to give in. we can do this. we are stronger than our mental illness. 😊🦋💕 always a dm away if anyone ever wants any support xxx #edrecovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #recovery #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #mentalhealthblogger #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalhealthstigma #nourishtoflourish #edawareness
Literally did not care about my tan lines (my “doing-life-lines”) when I wore this top yesterday. ✨
I had a great time while I happened to be wearing it & you know who said something about my odd tan?
No one. ✨
You know who said something about my arms & my back fat & the way it maybe draped weirdly in front when I sat down?
No one. ✨
My hope is that you can enjoy your life & be present with the people who matter the most to you. ✨
Wear the sexy thing, the comfortable thing, or the challenging thing... ✨
These are the days!✨
Happy Saturday #edfam
! How’s your weekend so far?! 💓
More than ever we are seeing people taking up sports, starting training, wanting to make a change to their physical health..but what is being neglected more and more is their mental health. By this I mean how people are viewing themselves and their training or fitness journey.
Training is addictive when you find what you love, you see results, you feel great, that endorphin high is so damn good..
But more and more we are seeing peoples mental approach to health change, disordered eating is on the rise, eating well becomes obsessing over calories, people are punishing themselves for enjoying a treat, panicking over taking a rest day, over training and abusing their bodies.
So take a step back, think about why you started training or wanted to change your eating habits and strip it back to basics. Eat good quality foods but still enjoy a treat, training should be for quality not quantity when you do train and listen to your body and give it the rest it needs. We all need a day off from work, your body needs a day off too!
#health #fitness #physicalhealth #mentalhealth #wellbeing #loveyourbody #nourish #training #rest #recover #edawareness #backtobasics #sport #strongisnotasize
I never thought I’d be comfortable in a crop top. That people would think I’m disgusting. That someone my weight alone determined what I could and couldn’t wear, that mostly consisted of dressing heavily regardless of how hot it was outside. My insecurities always got put before my health or happiness. That way of thinking was nothing other than toxic. You don’t need to be a certain weight to be happy, or to be able to wear the clothes you like. Your health and happiness and comfort should be put before anything, including people’s opinions of your image and your own self doubt.
#edawareness #anorexiarecovery #bulimiarecovery #selflove #bodypositivity #croptop #punk
How come healthy food is instantly correlated with “diet” & “weight-loss”?🥑
What if you genuinely want to be healthier? Not skinnier? Not thinner? Just healthier on the inside. Healthy food isn’t “diet” food. You don’t have to save it for your “summer shred” or your “bikini diet”. You can eat it whenever you want & it doesn’t have to have a label attached to it!
I’m not going to force a green detox juice down me cos it helps to “lose weight” but if I do decide to take a shot of turmeric ginger juice, it’ll be for the health benefits. Remember, eating veg doesn’t make you healthy & eating pizza doesn’t make you fat!🙏🏼❤️
📷 Mediterranean quinoa (1/2 pack from @aldiuk
), 1/2 avocado, 150g chicken breast & broccoli! Cooked with turmeric & paprika & @frylighthq
Exactly my experience. As my #eatingdisorder
progressed, I thought my BODY was just getting more & more out of control—not the DIETS (disguised as “lifestyles”—I was sucked into eliminating/reducing certain macronutrients). It was all the rules both in my head & from various macronutrient diet communities that told me my body was wrong.
I see people from binge eating forums asking for the members to encourage them not to eat a slice of cake—& I see all these comments that sound so much like an eating disorder, about how the cake is bad, how they will just feel gross & guilty afterward, regret, shame, more cravings, hunger skyrocketing... all these things my eating disorder told me. & all these thoughts contributed to even worse cravings & bingeing.
When I worked with a dietitian to eat ENOUGH, & with all the food groups, sugar never, EVER had the same life-sucking hold on me. Yes, I still have cravings for sugar/treats, but they are FUN cravings, & eased quickly & easily with a treat here & there—something I thought could NEVER happen to MY body.
If you’re plagued with terrible cravings & constantly resisting certain types of food, it’s time to take a look at your relationship with food. The life I’m living today is one I thought would never be attained eating the way I do now—anything I want, no crazy intense cravings, nutrient-dense with fun treats, & really, thinking very little about it at all.
#edrecovery #edawareness #eatingdisorders #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorderawareness #bingeeating #bingeeatingrecovery #bingeeatingdisorder #sugar
Is this a breakfast?🦋 3 pm. - 3.20 pm.
Pb and chocolate(1 square, melted) on toast, bananas.
When I eat too late the day before I am most likely to not get hungry the day after right away. Remember I ate a fruitbowl yesterday? That is why the time schedule of my meals are messed up.
I also haven't trained for 2 days this is also why I don't seem to need to eat so frequently? I guess? I am just tryna listening my body..
Ok now nevermind the time. Can you imagine how tasty that was??? 😳😳😳😳
Oh holy trinity. Peanut butter on toast is already a miracle by itself but when you add chocolate and bananas to it BOOM! HEAVEN.
Providing our perspectives on a complex dis-ease. Our shared mission is to bring about awareness, discovery, and truth regarding exercise addiction, body-image and recovery.