Late last night, I raised the white flag. 🏳 I sent a message to my therapist and (more or less) said, “This isn’t working.” I was exhausted. This
#anorexia and
#OCD combo can feel so big and overwhelming — and I’ve begun to feel outnumbered.
🔹🔹
At first, I felt like a failure for needing MORE help. Why couldn’t I just try harder? Why wasn’t this enough? It felt like I’d let my clinicians down, because here they were, doing everything they could — and I still couldn’t pull it together.
🔹🔹
In
#MentalHealth we talk a lot about asking for help. We should probably be talking a little bit more about asking for MORE help — because so often, we try to get by with the bare minimum because we’re ashamed of just how much we need.
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Real talk: It feels vulnerable and shitty to say, “Actually, I’m even more of a mess than we initially budgeted for.” But more often than not? Being willing to ask for more when it’s needed makes all the difference in recovery.
🔹🔹
So here I am, looking at my options, because my
#eatingdisorder is putting up a hell of a fight — and in order to live a full life, it’s demanding that I put up one, too. There aren’t shortcuts in recovery. Believe me, I’ve tried desperately to find them. (If you happen to have found one though... let me know?)
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And that’s why it’s so important to ask for what you need and deserve, instead of cutting corners. Because bringing the proverbial “knife to the gun fight” — especially when we’re talking about your mental health — is a risk you don’t need to take.
🔹🔹
That said, I had no idea there was even a white flag emoji. But I’m proposing that we all make use of it a little more often, yeah? 🏳🏳🏳