#RELAPSE

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#embrace #perfectionisboring In den letzten Tagen bin ich gefallen. Ich glaube jeder von uns kennt das. Und ich musste mich selber fangen. Ich mache mein komplettes denken, meine Verhaltensweisen und meine Stimmung von meinem aussehen und meinem Gewicht abhängig. Das mache ich nicht weil ich Oberflächlich bin, sondern weil ich krank bin. Aber die Welt verändert sich nicht wenn ich 4 Kilo mehr wiege. Keiner sieht das. Keiner merkt das. Keiner mag mich weniger gerne weil ich mehr Wiege. Außer meine Befindlichkeit,verändert das nichts. Ich möchte nicht das Gewichtsschwankungen mich so im Griff haben das ich mehrere Tage mein Leben aufgeben muss und wahnsinnig ins Strugglen gerate. Und vor allem möchte ich mich nicht mehr quälen. Ich möchte nicht wieder hungern, meinen Magen knurren lassen, mich ohne Kraft dazu zwingen stundenlang hin und her hin und her zu laufen. Das ist eine Qual, verschwendete Lebenszeit. Und wofür? Jeden Tag mehr Selbsthass entwickeln, nie zufrieden sein. Ich möchte diese Werte nicht vermitteln. Ich sehe nicht auf Frauen auf, die einen perfekten Körper haben. Ich sehe zu Frauen auf, die sich selber lieben. Die glücklich sind. Also warum sollte ich dann falschen Idealen hinterher rennen? Mein Bauch wird nie super flach sein. Weil das NICHT normal ist. Und ich werde auch nie wieder ein Six Pack haben, weil mir der Preis zu hoch, und ein KFA von 7% zu niedrig ist. Ich habe Dehnungsstreifen an meinen Oberschenkeln, Ich habe Flecken von Wärmflaschen an meinem Bauch, ich habe Narben auf meiner Brust und andere am Unterarm und ich habe Speckröllchen am Bauch. Das hat noch nie irgendjemanden gestört. Mein Leben war nicht besser und keiner mochte mich mehr als ich weniger gewogen habe. Und als ich 6 Kilo mehr hatte war das ganze auch nicht anders. WOZU die Qualen? Damit ich auf Instagram ein Bild posten kann unter dem dann andere Kommentieren können wie beeindruckend mein flacher Bauch ist und sich dann selber schlecht fühlen? Ich möchte das irgendwann andere zu mir auf gucken, weil ich einen beeindruckend Charakter habe und mich selber liebe und akzeptiere und sich selber dadurch viel besser fühlen. Ich möchte zeigen was wirklich zählt.
I'm just trying to sort my s**t out and get my life back on track after yet another relapse. But instead of being negative about it I'm gonna dust myself off and move forward. I'm thankful for everyone who's in my life and who isnt, they all played a role in healing me one way or another. And I'll never forget that ❤️ #selfcare #suicideprevention #socialmedia #healing #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #recovery #relapse #depression #opendm #anxiety #freshstart #onestepatatime #inspiration #quotestoliveby #quotesaboutlife #instaquote #insta #instagram #followmyjourney #followme #followforfollowback
This was about exactly my story through 2018 Ẹní tí story ẹ bá jọra, ó di dándán kó relate I was so close to giving up around this period, I had been strong for so long (about 6 months) and I had persisted with my normal activities as much as I could trying not to hold back, but I was getting tired; days that I thought myself invulnerable were now past, physical illness had great times feasting on me because whatever form of defense I had had now dwindled. It was real terror boiling within and I just wanted to cede to the demons — not through suicide though, but just give up on fighting/hanging on, I knew the implications of that, but it seemed way easier than what I'd suffered. Seeing Twyse detailing his depression and life challenges in this song gave me much hope, the kind of hope that I wasn't alone, the kind of hope that someone as strong and street-smart as @Twyse_116 had similar experiences (and he's probably still having). I was filled with joy & hope to keep pushing because it was barely about the same experiences narrated in this cuts that I had, My flatmates must have heard this tunes cos I played it almost every time, every time I noticed I was getting too weak. It did a lot to help Posting this video hopefully to help anyone who is passing through this and to tell that #youarenotalone and even a couple of people who we look up to pass through these things too, so you can hope to beat this & most importantly seek help when necessary ẸNÍ TÍ STORY Ẹ BÁ JỌRA, Ó DI DÁNDÁN KÓ RELATE Shalom! #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthadvocate #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalillness #endthestigma #SuicidePrevention #anxiety #depression #bipolar #ocd #ptsd #insomnia #recovery #relapse #invisibleillness #9ja #9jacomedy #Nigerian #naija #naijacomedy #nysc #abuja #kano #lagos #lekki #lekkiwives #igbo #yoruba
I so desperately want to go off my meds so maybe I can just feel a little bit more normal and less like a head case but if my social worker finds out I’ll be under even closer supervision. I know it’s a bad idea but I’ve been on them for well over a year now and I’m sick of not being able to do normal teenage stuff. ~~~~ #manicdepression #manic #anxiety #depression #selfharm #eatingdisorder #alcoholic #anxiety #panicattack #mentalhealth #mentalillness #anorexia #relapse
He is"ON FIRE"🔥🔥🔥🔥 . . . Edit by:ØM ๏_๏ . . . Why am I like this? Why is winter cold? Why is it when I talk I'm so biased to the hoes?.. . . . . @eminem #recovery #eminem #slimshady #marshalmathers #onfire #stans #hiphop #rap #edits #critics #rapgod #bars #lyrics #fyou #marshalmatherslp #slimshadylp #kamikaze #revival #curtaincalls #relapse #theeminemshow #encore #infinite #marshallmatherslp2 #3am #rehab #idc
When we're growing up we're told of fairy tales and happy ever afters... No one thinks they'll end up in the situation that they're in. Just because your in a bad place doesn't make you a bad person. It's life and thinks happen we least expect... You just have to move on and take each day as it comes ❤️ #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #mentalillness #bipolar #bipolarmemes #relapse #recovery #health #quotesaboutlife #insta #instaquote #depression #anxiety #inspiration #instagram #followmyjourney #followforfollowback
Sufferers are not alone – the Mental Health Foundation estimates that 4.7% of the population have anxiety problems, and one in six people will experience a neurotic disorder such as anxiety or depression in their lifetime. Fortunately, there are many things sufferers can do to get anxiety attacks in check and help regain control. At Red Umbrella, we want to help you find the right treatment for anxiety. Our advice is friendly, independent and, most important of all, completely focused on getting you the unique care and attention that you need. #soberlife #addiction #suicide #depression #mentalhealth #anorexia #eatingdisorder #abuse #alcoholic #drugaddiction #drugaddiction #selfharm #gamberlingproblem #gameaddiction #shoppingaddiction #internetaddiction #stress #wecanhelp #soberissexy #relapse #jesuscalling #jesuslovesyou #journeytohappiness #redumbrella #anxiety #7 #redbus #strength
Process of Relapse The relapse process is a lot like knocking over a line of dominoes. The first domino hits the second, which hits the third, and soon a chain reaction starts that throws us in the vicious cycle of addiction. We need to be aware of the first domino that hits us, the first problem that is usually our inability to cope or manage our emotions in recovery. If we are not aware and fail to use the program to address these initial problems, by the time the last domino falls our problems have accumulated and naturally we revert to our habitual way to deal with them – that is we use drugs. Read more on: http://hamrah.co/en/pages/steps-of-relapse/ #Hamrah #addiction #relapse #drugs #domino #recovery #emotions
.@Eminem 's "Relapse: Refill" has now over 900 million plays on Spotify. It's his 8th album to do so, making Em the only artist in history to achieve this. ➖ ➖ البوم (ريلابس ريفيل) من قبل ايمنم تخطت استماعاته على سبوتيفاي ال 900 مليون استماع، انه الألبوم الثامن الذي يحقق ذالك ل ايمنم ويجعل ايمنم الفنان الوحيد في التاريخ يحقق ذالك. ▪▪▪▪ #Eminem #EminemTour #EmunemRapGod #RapGod #SpaceBound #EminemRevival #SlimShady #SLLP #8Mile #EminemFans #EminemVenom #Venom #Relapse #EminemGoat #KingOfRap #RainyDays #EminemNews #Kamikaze #EminemKamikaze #Recovery #TheEminemShow #KillShot #Majesty #EminemMgk #Spotify
Squats. After a high stress and high anxiety few days / week I took it upon myself to train fasted this morning which I never do because I’m a massive diva with low blood sugar. The bambi-like left leg shows why I will never do this again. Off to eat some protein. #squats #flexfriday #friyay #gainz #bikinigirl #mentalhealth #anxiousmind #bodydysmorphia #recovery #setbacks #relapse #healthybodyhealthymind #getstrong #strongmind #strongwoman #dontgiveup
Is it bad I’m drinking straight liquor out of my childhood school centenary glass, this is my first relapse is 6 months, I feel better now then I did the entire time sober. The world and my life seems a lot lighter and clearer now and I feel like I can deal with the current crisis I’m in. Lord I prayed and prayed and went to church every Sunday but I’m a failure at this game called life, everytime I felt like I was so close to a break through... BAM💥 I WAS PUSHED BACK ON MY FACE! Anyways stay tuned for the next episode, we all have our poisons that cure our wounds and I’m just tending to mine atm 🍷😏 . . . . . . . #tawnyport #portwine #winelover #wine #relapse #itriedsohard #sadlife #bipolar #depression #anxiety #mentalhealth #sad #mentalillness #depressed #mentalhealthawareness #suicide #selfharm #ptsd #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #alcoholicsanonymous #mentallyunstable #mentallydrained #fucktheworld #ifmywoundswerevisible
I'm disgusted with myself I'm just a giant set of chores I'm disappointing everyone and bothering them I feel like I don't belong to anywhere, even those who love me (I don't get them, why would they love me..) are making it clear that I am a too heavy chore. I eat too much, I talk too much, i cry too much, I take too much space, I am too lazy and I'm a giant useless fat mess. #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #ana #recovery #ed #edrecovery #fooddiary #food #foodblog #eatingdisorder #ednos #edfam #anafighter #healthy #fearfood #recoverywin #intermittentfasting #fear #if #fdoe #tca #anorexie #vegan #mentalhealth #tw #mentalillness #relapse #weightloss
. امنيم اصدر ألبوم The Slim Sahdy LP النسخة الموسعة قبل ذكرى صدور الألبوم الـ20، النسخة تحتوي على فيرسات قديمة و مقاطع صغيرة، وبهذه النسخة مجموع أغاني الألبوم الأن اصبحت 30. - ▪▪▪▪ #Eminem #eminemtour #Eminemfans #kamikaze #killshot #rapgod #rapper #slimshady #relapse #8mile #marshallmatherslp2 #slimshadylp #majesty #recovery   #brabbit #kingofrap #utube #youtube #eminemx #eminemxxv #eminemking #TheSlimShadyLP #eminemrapgod #eminemworld #feminem #eminemforlife #eminemvsmgk #eminem2019
This makes me 😂 so much! They talk about #miracles happening in #recovery ! When I was in #rehab - for my life threatening multiple #addictions - in 2001- my therapists had to put thumb screws on me to tell ‘the group’ of other #addicts , in my Life Story, that i was born #intersex . Only my ex-girlfriends since I was 24 (when I finally got told the truth) knew that Dark Secret. After being read the riot act that if I didn’t tell the truth about my body the ‘secrets keep us sick’ & my £35,000 spent on rehab would be a complete waste of money, I’d very likely relapse on the #shame I was carrying & probably die; as I was so close to jumping off a bridge into the Thames at the end of my #rockbottom . Returning to that place when we #relapse & usually sinking a level or 5! I relented and told the merry band of newcomers in the @priorygroup for Christmas that I was born with internal testes- healthy & removed aged 8- & I have XY not XX chromosomes. But I didn’t mention my #clitoris 🤫. I was so ashamed to look different to normals. Fast forward to 2006 and clitty gets a mention in my @the.independent Coming Out story.🤭 But hardly anyone reads that! And now in 2019, I’m boasting about being XL on stage @thecomedystore in LA & sharing with anyone who will listen- well @salty.world cool young readership that I have 1300+ Likes on @okcupid and am now deep in #ProjectPanda 🐼 to find the #Magnificient7 cross gender/age/races/kinks/lovers to blast through my #fuckitlist before I’m 50 this year. That’s another f***** miracle. Me live to 50?! That’s #HP ! And I’m now 17 years #sober & a #recovery & #intersex Advocate & writing a one-hour #standup special about sex, love, dating apps, identity and how my beautiful friend @rivergallo & I - the only 2 out #intersexy actors in LA- are proactively seducing #Hollywood to tell our stories and show the 🌎 we exist & are brave, beautiful and too 🔥 to handle! 😂 PS on #tshots my clit just keeps growing. Will I get the @guinnessworldrecords ?! I hope so 🏅💪🏼 #BritsInLA 🇬🇧 PPS go see @ponyboi_film in Sydney this week & @britishfilminstitute Flare in London 21-31st March 🌎🎉
So... I’m getting a new doctor around Easter..;-; and I can tell you that it’s something that I’m more than scared of. I hate meeting new people especially when they are going to be something like me doctor, teacher or psychiatrist..;-; I hate the thought of having to get to know a new person... and I honestly think that my current doctor is amazing. I can tell her everything and she always seem so understanding and caring. She is the only one I feel like I’m “safe” telling my secrets to and when she’s gone I don’t feel like I have anyone around me who I know.. she has been my doctor from the beginning (wasn’t my doc for almost a year, but she’s been the nicest so far) and I haven’t really had another doc who I’ve liked... so as you in I’m scared. Like.. what if the new doctor isn’t as nice and understanding? What if I haven’t gotten a better relationship with my psychiatrist before she’s taking over? What if I’m going to be misunderstood again? Ugh... • • • • • -tags- #hi #mentalhealth #Depression #aliceinwonderland #hair #hairdye #dyedhair #yellowhair #yellow #ootd #feelingblue #me #instaphoto #black #nonbinary #lgbt #lgbtq #cat #kitten #softemo #ed #relapse #unicorn #tumblr #alternative #circlelenses #photo #newacc #emo ?
We ran out of drugs pretty fast but had an amazing night just talking with an old friend. Talking about everything, the Good, the bad, the horrible. It was a Lovely night. Its now 0816 and I have to see my probation officer at 1400. SO I GUESS ILL GET SOME SLEEP #relapse #amphetamine #selfharm
Well Happy Birthday to me 🙃 In kind of an okayish mood today but I binged every evening since Tuesday and that is really bad. Thought it was due to a lack of willpower or sth. like that but I just got my period (although Im severe underweight! -WTF?!) and hopefully that is the reason for me eating like a pig. Too ashamed to weight myself this morning..... Need to get back on track #anorexia #recovery #relapse #lego #happy #birthday #clown
22. Februar 2019 Trowback zu meinem gestrigen Frühstück 🌼 Es gab Kokusnussjoghurt mit Mango und Banane und Granatapfel, dazu ein paar Haselnüsse und Cranbeeries🍌 Ein kleines Update Momentan hab ich sehr mit meinen Gedanken zu hadern, es fällt mir schwer nich anzunehmen und mich nicht so vor mir selber zu ekeln. 😔 Dabei ging es mir doch anfangs Jahres so gut. Njn gut genug geklagt, es gibt auch positives🤗 ich muss nur noch alle zwei Wochen zum Arzt gehen und mich dort wiegen lassen. Momentan bin ich wieder bei meinen Grosseltern, dort gejt es mir immer etwas besser als Zuhause ❤ sie sind einfach toll und helfen mir soweit es ihnen möglich ist, und ich kann ihnen gar nicht genug danken. Ich eünsche euch einen schönen Tag 💕 #Anorexie #Anorexianervosa #ed #edwarrior #edfighter #recovery #recovering #recover #ortorexia #weightloss #relapse #inpatient #positive #fight #fitness #sport #orthorexia #stronger #eatittobeatit #healthy #eat #Magersuchtrecovery #exercise #fitness #Anorexic #Ed #orthorexic #ortorexia #weightloss #relapse
#ketobeginner #dinner #dustoffstartagain #resilience #movetowards #values . . . . #personalfailures #personalsuccess #samesamebutdifferent After my #cake #relapse yesterday, I made a decent low carb medium protein dinner ... getting back to the right thing was helpful to my mind too ... I didn’t end my day in the story of failing ... and of course there is only feedback, Keto isn’t an exam is acwaybif eating that requires some real conscious effort ... and some preparing ahead when there are chafes to routines ... In that aspect it’s feedback that life offers and we get to accept learn give thanks and move forwards. #challenging yes #impossible no never ... #oursmallvictories matter and our small losses too. But we humans are built with a negativity bias therefore it ya essential to celebrate #smallwins and #batheingratitude for the small wins ... it’s good for heart brain and gut too
20 years ago Eminem introduced himself to the world with his debut album “The Slim Shady LP” a hip-hop classic and it established Em’ in the hip-hop scene and began his rise to stardom. #Eminem #SlimShady #MarshallMathers #SSLP20 #SSLP #MMLP #TheEminemShow #Encore #Kamikaze #MMLP2 #Relapse #ShadyRecords #HipHop #Rap #Lyricism #GOAT
(Music rights belong to NF and his team! I take NO ownership of the audio)!!!!! . ..... .... .... ..... It’s been hard lately... not gonna lie... keeping myself going... you see I’ve been dealing with mental illness for about 13 years and let me tell you, it sucks. Recovery sucks. No one tells you that it’s going to be hard. No one tells you that there will be moments in which you wish you were back in that mental fog of numbness because you would rather feel nothing than the pain you feel inside. Or how the hollowness of the ghost that haunted you for years isn’t going to leave you the same. You see mental illness changes a person. It takes there most beloved, most protected, and the most valued parts of a person and poisons it. Makes it bitter to the taste and causes you to spit it out. Literally spit out who you are as a person. Because it takes over and leaves you in a moving car going 100 on the interstate and you’re in the passenger’s seat and no one’s in control. Imagine that feeling of inescapable doom following you around for years... if you don’t think that will change a person... honey I don’t know what will. But I’m here and i keep going because i don’t give myself that decision not to. Stay lifted little buds 😔❤️ its get better one day it won’t hurt as much I promise ❤️❤️❤️ #mentalhealthawareness #depressionepisodes #sleepdeprived #insomnia #nightterrors #livingnightmares #mentalillness #majordepressivedisorder #majoranxietydisorder #ptsd #illbeokay #youllbeokay #weed #dabpen #highthoughts #perspective #roadtorecovery #relapse #dab #pen #carts #cannabis #cannabiscommunity #cannabisculture #stoner #stonernation #highsociety #prettypotheads #stonergirl
aaand also had nightsnack
this was dinner. one of my fave combos and this time I had mixed quinoa and not just white one. it had so much more flavour but the mixed one is much more expensive than the regular white one
forgot to post yd but also thought it'd just interrupt my "flow" if I stopped to post. now it's early morning the next day and I haven't slept yet but eh. yd was average but productive in a way. folded the laundry, vacuumed the house and washed my hair. then I had a deep conversation w dad again for 1,5 hrs!? I planned to do sth else during that time but talking w him helped me not to freak out about not doing what I wanted bc it wasn't as important as having an insightful talk w dad who's been really helpful lately. I even started to struggle to enjoy yoga so he wants me to do it for 1,5 hrs every day but it's actually kinda difficult 😅 managed to do an hour in the evening after a workout and boy was it difficult at first my mind would not shut up! I really forgot how to relax
I don’t give a whaaat.com 👊🏻💀💦 *wakes up yells ITS FRiDAY BiTChES* .. someones random next neighbor.. (i hate neighbors)🤷🏼‍♂️🤬😤 #slimshady #attitude #fuckoff #godsentme #topisstheworldoff #eminem #relapse #strong #mindset #quotes #swiss #switzerland #lacoste #gym #ready #focus #prepare #construction #healthy #liveartworthy #hellyeah #legday #work #mode #style #fashion
Love looking in the grass and finding fortunes that were in someone else's cookie. Have you ever found one ? Did you pick it up ? Grateful for negative moments as they are filled with beautiful seeds for growth if you look for them it is "easier" to ignore them.
Dear Chronic-ills I’ve climbed your relapse hill You will not break my will -Sophia A Johnson📜🖋💜🌹 ————————————————————————When I’m down, I rest. And when I’m up, I do my best. Stay in the fight, it is all that we can ever do. Continue to defy the odds Loves and never ever give up (on yOURself). ~Sophia A Johnson💋🎤🎶 {Working in this “peace”} ———————————————————————— Cover Song Snippet: ‘Elastic Heart’ by @siamusic ————————————————————————#singer #writer #artist #music #poetry #practice #process #cover #Sia #snippet #elasticheart #upsanddowns #journey #motivation #positivevibes #love #faith #chronicillness #warrior #chronicpain #fatigue #relapse #recovery #push #wellness #nevergiveup #follow #soamoyjo #SophiaAJohnson
Cardiac visit went great-although my scale thinks I'm 300 and his professional one says 296 with clothes on. Well, whatever the number is, its down from my relapse high last year of 320. I'll take it. This time, I'm doing it the old fashioned way-eating right, balanced, moving and as slowly as I need to without any gimmicks. #relapse #fat2fit #health #diabetic #weightloss #fitfam #neverquit #nevergiveup #cleanfood #exercise #healthmatters
Black bean pasta, a whole can of stir fry veggies, veggie crumbles & ginger sesame sauce for an amazing dinner 😊 I mixed it all together after taking the picture. Body image is absolute shit right now so I’m rocking baggy clothes every day. I know that’s not a permanent solution but right now I need that to feel comfortable.
this is facts it doesn’t matter what you say! 😌 @eminem @realcoleworld
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