A story: Once upon a time (that time being year ago, 6 months ago even) it would’ve completely derailed my entire life that my laptop crashed yesterday. My suicidal depression would’ve taken this unfortunate tech-dump & turned it into one more reason added to a long list I had to no longer participate in this life. I would’ve been thinking about how this shit (laptops crashing) always happens to me (also: it happens to everyone). I would’ve been thinking about spending money I didn’t have on a new laptop I didn’t even want only to have that one crash in however many more years (because Negative Nancy). I would’ve been thinking what the fuck is the point. Of a laptop. Of life.
The two would’ve been inseparable, my brain would’ve been incapable of thinking about the crashed laptop without also thinking about taking my life. Because that’s what the lens of depression does, it takes over every thought and makes it its own. It finds the negative in every situation and feeds on it. It makes everything worse than it is and prevents you from seeing any different. In the case of suicidal depression, it convinces you the only answer is to not be here anymore.
It’s taken several years, a dozen+ meds, transcranial magnetic stimulation, ketamine, nutrition, exercise, therapy and more to get me to the safe and stable place where my laptop can crash and it doesn’t put me in harm’s way. To get me to the place where I buy a new one and move on with my life. To get me to the place where my life isn’t threatened by something that happens to people every day.
To get me to the place where I’m stable ...enough.
And here’s the reality: am I mentally & physically at 100%? No. I have a long way to go to continue getting well & to stay well. But now that I’ve gone through a crashed laptop without an existential crisis attached, I know stability is worth the work.
It’s worth the pain.
It’s worth the struggle.
It’s worth the devastation.
It’s worth the breaking down and building back up that automatically comes with recovering from depression.
And it’s worth it for you.
Love & Manifest from here,
We grow through what we go through 🌱
Here are tips to help you deal with the grieving process:
1. Don't tolerate self-accusing or superstitious thoughts.
2. Be on alert for negative thoughts. Literally say, "STOP!" to snap yourself out of it.
3. Surround yourself with a loving, supportive community.
4. Face your feelings. I can tell you staring the dragon in the face is way better than ignoring it. You are strong enough.
5. Express your feelings. I personally found journaling to be very helpful after I lost my mother. I was in shock and disbelief for a long time but looking back at my journal helped me to gauge the grieving precess. It showed me just how far I had come.
6. Focus on self-care. Make sure you take care of your physical health as much as you can.
7. Join a group grief counseling group. Hospice is a great resource for this. I personally got a lot out of a group setting and connecting with others who are going through the grief process.
8. Honor where you are in the process. Do not judge yourself or allow anyone else to tell you how you should grieve. Be gentle and kind to yourself.
9. Re-frame your thinking; View setbacks as opportunities for growth.
10. Plan ahead for "triggers" like the holidays, anniversaries, etc. This is always a tough time so understand that is completely normal. it is best to communicate with your friends and family what you need during this time to honor yourself and your loved one who passed.
🎠 Childcare is self-care 🎠
That's true and false at the same time. ✨ .
It's true, because I feel invincible when I'm with you, baby girl. 💪 I feel strong and beautiful and super cool and like the funniest comedian of all times. I can jump, run, scream, dance, sing and pretend I'm a unicorn shark (unishark?) in public and nobody cares. I can be fully myself and you still look at me like I'm the superhero the world/your world was waiting for. ❤
It's false, because it can be exhausting and nerve-wracking to discuss with you. I feel helpless when you cry. You're driving me nuts when you ask 500 questions at the same time (mostly "why?") and outsmart me (you're 3 years old! Stop!) and I'm overwhelmed when I want to hurry and you don't. 😵
But being with you is a gift that I can hardly put in words. 💫 You're so awesome, baby girl. You're smart and brave and happy and you make my heart so full, it could burst sometimes. I'm the proudest godmother, because you are in my life. ❤ I love you to the moon 🌙, the sun ☀ and back, Mini. 💋
#godmother #miniandme #effyourbeautystandarts #celebratemysize #celebratemycurves #honormycurves #mentalhealthawareness #curvygirl #mentalhealthwarrior #bodyposiwarrior #plussizefashion #ptsdsurvivor #mentalhealthadvocate #breakthestigma #bodypositivity #bopowarrior #loveyourbody #goldenconfidence #loveyourskin #pixiecut #marketingmanagement #salesmanager #marketing #lovetheskinyourein #ootd #marketers #mentalhealth #queen #selflove
Hey! EMS & Emergency Medicine providers! I know you see patients with substance use disorder multiple times a day & probably feel like you know everything there is to know about it. .
Well did you know there are effective treatments to help patients break the cycle, reduce overdose death rates, & become wonderful memebers of society again, but you just don’t see them because they don’t need Emergency care?
But what if they do need care for a separate reason? Like being a passenger in car accident resulting in a femur fracture. Would you treat their pain or let them suffer because they were an “addict” once? What about the recovering alcoholic on naltrexone, did you know it has potential fatal contraindications with opioid pain control commonly used in EMS? Now what?
Well, I am presenting on this very topic at an up coming conference- “Acute Care Considerations for Substance Use Disorder Patients Receiving Medication Assisted Treatment”. AKA “How the hell should ER & EMS providers manage pain in patients taking suboxone & naltrexone?”
If you’re Interested in the topic, but don’t think you have it in the budget for a jet set trip to the ritzy, “Venice of the Midwest” Joplin? (I made that up, no clue if it’s called that) Let me know, I’m happy to share this info with EMS departments, medic educators, or anyone else. It’s important stuff!
#ems #paramedicschool #paramedic #foamed #emseducation #substanceabuse #addictionrecovery #addictionawareness #continuingeducation #nursing #emergencymedicine #doctor #emt #nremt #criticalcare #criticalcareparamedic #prehospitalcare #firefighter #medicationassistedtreatment #recovery #breakthestigma #podcastlife #podcast #medical #physicianassistant #nursepractitioner #nursepractitionerstudent
Here are a few tips for managing #panicattacks
: swipe or see below for tips on how to regain control of your body during panic attacks.
Practice deep breathing - Focus on taking deep breaths in and put through your mouth. Feeling the air slowly fill your chest and belly and then slowly leave them again.
Repeat a positive phrase - Focus on repeating a phrase that you feel connected to that has a positive message and grounds you in reality.
Relax your muscles- try relaxing your muscles in increments. Focus on uncurling your fingers and toes, then moves your shoulders, forearm and through your torso.
Find a focus object- pick a familiar object to focus on. This can be looking at your shoes or feeling the fabric in your T-shirt.
Recognize you're having a panic attack- on of the first steps in take control of a panic attack is to recognize that you're having one.
Close your eyes- some panic attacks comes from triggers that overwhelm you. This can block out any extra stimuli & make it easier to focus on your breathing.
Practice mindfulness- mindfulness can help ground you in the reality of what's around you. These specific sensation ground you firmly in reality and gives you something objective to focus on.
Excerpts via powerofpositivity.com
Sometimes we just need someone else to remind us to breathe
Well. This book has been a long time coming. I'm not strong enough to sit down and write it all at once, so bits and pieces have been put to paper when I'm in a mental space that it's even possible. Which, let's be honest, isn't often.
My therapist has helped me see that to heal I need to face what happened and stop repressing and burying those moments where life as I knew it ended and the new life I never wanted began. The only way I know how to do this is write it. Craft it into a story with real life moments and characters that have shaped my entire being, from the moment that Sunday morning changed everything.
Maybe I'll never finish it. Maybe the writing will be complete trash and it'll get buried in the bottom of a folder of documents. But for my recovery it's something I need to attempt. I'm sharing it because I'm not ashamed of the reasons behind my mental illness and PTSD, and I will never be afraid to #fightintheopen
#breakthestigma #ptsd #anxietydisorder #recovery #anxiety #depression #itsoktonotbeok #warrior #amateurwriter #dreams #goals #fingerprintonthestars #angelbrother
Day 19: FULL MOON - What am I drawing into my life right now? - The Magician - I’m drawing in my personal power to create the reality I want. I don’t have to feel limited by my circumstances anymore because I know there are things I can do to bring about change. I’m awake to my true power as a part of this universe. I may not have total control over my destiny, but I can do what I can do. #soultarotchallenge
Follow up from a recent post - .
Mental ILLNESS NOT Mental HEALTH. .
I have mental illness.
If I wasn’t I would not be on antidepressants and consuming cannabis.
If I had mental health I would have some good days... if I had mental health I wouldn’t have had the panic attack that I had this morning.
Yesterday I was on top of the world. Then I woke up this morning.
Is it my PMDD? Is it the moon? Is it mental illness ??? I’m sitting here wondering why I break with pressure? I know how strong I am, I know what I’ve survived.
During my panic attack, the overwhelming feeling of claustrophobia and intense shaking and crying I told my self to snap out of it because I had to go to work. I picked myself up after letting some out, and I walked up the stairs, ran my hands in freezing water and splashed my face. I looked in the mirror and I said “get your shit together, we don’t have time for this” and I cried harder then got my shit together. .
I’m sharing all of me because that’s what this is about. No one is perfect. This is me. My truth. My life. Daily. .
We’re making a list and checking it twice! Final touches all around. The SMHFF team is grateful and humbled by all your warm support so far. Sending love and light, we can’t wait to meet you all tomorrow!
More info: www.smhff.com
Singapore Mental Health Film Festival 2019, February 21st - 24th @theprojectorsg #SMHFF #MyMentalCare
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What are your thoughts? Tell us below👇👇#Repost @mothersmary_jordana
Alcohol vs. Cannabis
Very controversial topic! 🤐🤷🏻♀️🤣
Once upon a time ago alcohol was illegal. It wasn’t until 1933 that President Roosevelt legalized it. This was 86 years ago 👀
Fast forward to 2019
People are drinking alcohol with their breakfast (mimosas) and having a glass of wine at dinner; continuing to normalize its presence and act like it’s 100% part of life and OK because well I guess it kind of is 🤷🏻♀️
Here’s a little fact about alcohol use in the United States... “there are approximately 88,000 deaths and 2.5 million years of potential life lost (YPLL) each year in the United States due to excessive alcohol use” (link in bio to full article)
Parents drink in front of their children & allow their kids to have beer at 15 (under the legal age).
Heck in some parts of the world, alcohol is given to children...
Now turn that around to cannabis 😱A natural plant that was LEGAL until around the same time alcohol became legal 🤨
Today most people (moms included) are scared to use cannabis - even while knowing it helps with over 50 illnesses- not to mention is better then Advil and Tylenol!! It’s truly mind boggling how our society has accepted alcohol and how it’s “no big deal” to drink.
Let’s talk cannabis related deaths 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼
Try and google cannabis related deaths and it’s kind of funny what comes up... a great article from Straightup.com discusses how statistics surrounding cannabis “overdose” ahem has been very misleading. (Link in bio)
There’s no need to shame anyone who uses something you don’t. I’m not here to criticize alcohol consuming people - and you should NOT be over there criticizing cannabis consuming people. Just saying and leaving this here 💋✌🏻
You are not broken.
It has been a touching experience to see people opening up to me with their quiet questions and concerns.
I have had a few friends message me to say that they've been struggling, but haven't been sure how to vocalize their feelings.
Sometimes it's hard to know what normal is suppose to feel like, especially if you've been struggling with depression for a long time without realizing it.
For ages I convinced myself that these heavy emotions were part of my personality. I guess I realized something was wrong when I noticed that I would never talk about it.
Exploring your mental health for the first time can seem like a scary new world. I'm working on a blog post for those of you who think you might be depressed but aren't sure. We'll talk about what normal sadness looks like and what steps you can take to start feeling better.
You are not weird. You are not broken. You are struggling and, you know what? That's okay ❤️
My website is now LIVE! Check it out by going to www.brittanymurrayglobal.com (link in my bio) to see my newly releasing products and to subscribe for exclusive updates and offers! 💕
Hey, what’s up, hello.
I’ve been struggling with my #mentalhealth
lately and when it happens my physical health falls to the wayside every time. My #bingeeating
gets out of control thus perpetuating my self-loathing and anxious thoughts. Isn’t life fun?
this time around and accepting that all my funky feelings are valid but DO NOT have to rule my life.
Acknowledging that exercise makes me feel better every time and that healthy foods nourish the brain and not just the body.
The road to any kind of success is not linear but I can no longer afford for my lows to anchor me down. #babysteps
Our silent auction is going to be directing funds to
mypasskit.com an exciting local initiative providing their PASS kits to local post secondary schools.
The PASS kit, is a self care tool for communities and individuals to manage daily stressors and stimulate the mental health discussion. We are very excited to be adding Tina Chan’s organization to our beneficiaries. @mypasskit